Chapter 17: Guns & Roses (5)

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Chapter 17: Guns & Roses (5)

The next day, Miao Yuan went to the café to gift Momo the zenggao and confide in her about her dream-like dating experience. Listening to her, Momo laughed inconspicuously, “Having to endure the dark of night, the clouds have finally parted to show you the brilliant moon hidden within.”

Miao Yuan smiled sweetly.

The nearby office buildings had just opened up a year ago, and business in the cafe suddenly boomed. The boss had recruited Milu, a young cook in his early twenties, to help out. He appeared gentle and cute, and specialized in Italian cuisine.

Miao Yuan and Momo had at first pretended to be good, well-mannered women. But they quickly discovered that underneath Milu’s refined exterior, he was actually a gossip through and through. Thus, everyone dropped their pretenses and quickly became closer. They all allied in the battle against their boss.  

The fairytale-like first date had raised her expectations as to what was to come. Not even a few days had passed and Momo began hearing this girl complaining:

“Tell me, why do you think Chen Mo never takes the initiative to call me?”

“Tell me, why do you think Chen Mo never texts me to ask me what I’m doing?”

“Tell me, when Chen Mo can’t see me, does he miss me?”

“Tell me, do you think Chen Mo knows I’m always thinking about him?”

“Tell me, should I tell Chen Mo I’m always thinking about him?”

“Tell me, if Chen Mo knew I’m always thinking about him, would he take me for granted?”

“Tell me… Chen Mo…”

Momo rolled her eyes skyward. She felt like she was about to start vomiting white foam!

“If you miss him, then just tell him!”

“I don’t want to!” Miao Yuan played with her finger self consciously. “I’m a girl. Why does it always have to be me who takes the initiative? Would it kill him to give me a call first!” 

“I don’t think it would kill him…” Momo looked gently at Miao Yuan, “I just think that if this continues any longer, you’d die from all that complaining. I’d also die, from you annoying me to death.” 

Miao Yuan let out a faint sigh. Oh love, you really make people happy! You really make people sad!

But that age-old question of whether love brings happiness or sadness should be temporarily set aside. Momo thought that with love, you either stick to being reserved or stick to being a loudmouth. If you’re a loudmouth by nature, don’t pretend to be reserved. That’d just be hurting all parties, including yourself.

Miao Yuan tearfully asked, “Momo, then what type am I?”

Momo looked her up and down. Brimming with warmth, she grasped Miao Yuan’s hand and said, “Darling, to be honest, being a happy shrew ain’t a bad thing!”

Miao Yuan clenched her jaw. She knew there was truth to what Momo said.

One option was to just stick to taking the initiative. In any case, Chen Mo had a good temperament and let her have her way. The other option was to resolutely leave him on the tenterhooks and let his heart ache.

The worst was where she was now: keeping score in the relationship. She was waiting for him to make a move, yet she couldn’t bear the wait. The so-called splendor of entanglement. Her worries wound around her heart so many times that they formed a bouquet.

Isn’t that why they say a maiden in love is poetic? And aren’t those poems always nonsensical—superfluous and full of those winding thoughts?

While Miao Yuan was busy worrying, Chen Mo had entered the year’s hectic period. Since it was the end of the year, important figures all payed a visit to show their closeness, much to the dismay of the low-level soldiers, who had to receive person after person, crop after crop. Those people were like garlic chives come autumn, an endless field to scythe. Chen Mo was in charge of the detachment leader’s trump card: five elite squads. Every passing person wanted to pay a visit. The torment nearly drove Chen Mo and his squad mad.

Chen Mo wasn’t as socially adept as Xia Minglang. Some things were hard to say aloud, so he would let them slide and go with the flow. But people are not made of iron; they get tired. When the weather got chilly, his old wound would act up and his Achilles tendon would faintly ache.

While speaking on the phone that night, Chen Mo rubbed his foot.

Miao Yuan asked, “What are you doing right now?”

Chen Mo passingly said a few words, but who knew she would take it to heart.

Back in her student days, Miao Yuan didn’t learn biology well. After half a day of studying, she still couldn’t remember where the Achilles tendon was. She reckoned she should heed the saying: Treat the symptoms, not the cause1.

Early next morning, she went to the grocery store for pig trotters and half a catty of beef tendon. She hauled them back to the shop and tossed them in a slow cooker with peanuts, soybeans, and the like. Previously, the slow cooker languished in the shop, only to be used for making congee as a midnight snack.

Who knew that peanuts and pig trotters would produce such a fragrance? The lunch-time customers all eagerly asked, “What’s the new product this time? What’s that smell?”

Miao Yuan was too embarrassed to confess that it was something for her own use. Instead, she told a bold-faced lie, saying it was a stew for Christmas. After simmering for over three hours, the soup started to thicken. The delicate bubbles burst with a blub, blub.

Milu had misplaced Miao Yuan’s evaporated milk into the freezer. After finding where it went, she thawed it. But the oil and water had somewhat separated. Miao Yuan was suddenly inspired. She poured some in and stirred. It still seemed to lack flavour though, so she added a vanilla bean. Things started getting out of hand.

It simmered till almost dinner time. The stew brewed into a nightmare of deliciousness. A customer couldn’t endure it anymore and came over to ask, “What smells this good? I don’t care about the price. How about you just give me a bowl.”

As she looked at the customer with a pained, sorrowful expression, Miao Yuan was like Eugénie Grandet2 with his green eyes.

With a wave of her hand, Momo decisively robbed Miao Yuan of a half a bowl of stew.

Soon enough, Momo and Milu were licking the bottoms of their bowls and sighing in content. Momo said, “Miao Miao, I sometimes feel like your Chen Mo lacks a brain. Why don’t you fill that empty hole by cooking something for him tomorrow too?”

Miao Yuan coldly raised her cake knife. “Watch me chop your devil head off with this knife!”

Momo gave a high-pitched laugh and hid behind Milu.

Miao Yuan couldn’t keep simmering the stew. This den was full of wolves. She filled a thermos and fled.

Momo chased her to the door and laughed, “Miao Miao, why don’t you get a sex change and take me as your wife!”

Milu followed, jeering, “Miao Miao, why don’t you not get a sex change so that you can take me as your wife!”

Miao Yuan ground her teeth. From afar, she flipped the middle finger.

Momo laughed till she was out of breath. Raising her right hand, she responded with an OK sign.

Miao Yuan almost fell over.

Today, the sentinel at the gate was one of the soldiers who had tasted Miao Yuan’s cake. His honeyed tongue called out, “Sister-in-law, I’ll call the captain for you.”

Chen Mo’s voice over the phone sounded somewhat occupied. “What’s the matter? I have a meeting right now. Everyone’s waiting.”

Miao Yuan suddenly felt a little empty inside. She merely said, “I brought you something to eat. Come over and pick it up. I’ll leave right away.”

“All right.” Chen Mo hung up with a click.

Miao Yuan stared blankly at the receiver in her hand. At this moment, her enthusiasm, like fire, was extinguished in half.

Chen Mo quickly came over, sprinting the whole way. His head steamed with heat.

Miao Yuan handed him the thermos. “If you’re busy, then head back first!”

Chen Mo nodded, whispering, “Thank you” before turning to leave.

Miao Yuan stood in front of the door, straining her neck to watch Chen Mo as he ran into the building and out of sight.

He didn’t turn around.

Miao Yuan was disappointed. It was as though she had lost something.

Pork Trotter and Peanut Soup

Note from the team: Below is the fake chapter we had released for April Fool’s. We hope you enjoy both! 

Fake Chapter
Walking through the cold streets in the night, Chen Mo thought back to the drama Miao Yuan was watching. If it were me, I’d be more aggressive in keeping her for myself. As he thought this, his steps slowed, before coming to a halt. He stood in one spot for a few minutes, staring into the starlit sky, before revealing a hint of determination on his face and turned back towards Miao Yuan’s home.

Miao Yuan, snuggling with the fluffy bunny toy she got as Chen Mo’s gift to her, was sat on the sofa pouting. Muuuu, why can’t he be more proactive in our relationship? I want a drama romance sometimes, too! She dug her face into the soft animal, making strange sounds.

“Ah, Chen Mo! Chen Mo! Know that I’m yours and wish to be ravaged!”

She giggles to herself, since she believes this won’t ever happen any time soon.



Hearing a knocking at her front door, Miao Yuan was a little taken back. Who could be visiting at this time of night? Ah! Is it a thief come to steal from me!?! She balled her fists in front of her, striking a punching pose, before slowly walking to her door.


Well, if anything happens, I hope Chen Mo will at least somehow come to my rescue…Closing her eyes, she carefully opened the door, to which Chen Mo barged in and grabbed her arms.

“Kyaaa! No! I haven’t even had my first night yet!” She screamed into Chen Mo’s ears, trying to get away from him.

“Miao Miao.”


She slowly opened her eyes and froze in place, staring at the pure beauty of the handsome Chen Mo. Oh my goodness! What did I just say!?! ‘Haven’t even had my first night’?!! What was I thinking!?! Looking incredibly embarrassed, she shyly turned her eyes up and watched Chen Mo cutely.

“Um….did you leave something behind, by any chance?”

Chen Mo stared at Miao Yuan for a few seconds, his eyes holding a smouldering heat that felt like they could burn through her. He pulled her close and hugged her, kissing her small forehead.

“Yes. I left my courage behind.”

He lifted her chin up with his slender fingers, and passionately kissed her.


Miao Yuan’s tongue was taken hostage by Chen Mo’s, he swirled it around hers before sliding it up and down. His hands began roaming down her arms and back, before reaching her rear and squeezing. Not knowing how to properly react, Miao Yuan simply rode the waves of pleasure she was receiving, and wrapped her arms around his neck.

After a good few minutes of erotic tongue dancing, Chen Mo finally released his lips from hers, a trail of silvery saliva keeping them connected. Gasping for breath, Miao Yuan’s eyes were dazed as she already could not think straight. Looking into her eyes, Chen Mo picked her off her feet and carried her to her bedroom.

“Not had your first night, you say? Then let me be the one to take it.”

He dropped her on the bed and began unbuttoning his shirt, his eyes filled with a scorching heat as they never left Miao Yuan’s body. Her mind not fully caught up to her situation, she lay there staring dumbfounded at Chen Mo’s actions, his chiseled chest soon coming into view in all of its sexy glory.


She began to say, before having her mouth sealed once more by Chen Mo’s. His hands reached her top, and began slowly riding it up, brushing his fingers against her bare skin. Moving his mouth away, once again, his eyes were so close to hers, before he looked at her body. Pulling her top over her head, he admired the view of her small breasts inside her cute pink bra.

“Beautiful.” He murmured. So cute, just like an animal…my prey.

He slid his hand under her bra and started massaging her soft mound.


Miao Yuan felt a rush of heat between her legs as she was overcome by Chen Mo’s arousing touch. Is this a dream? Have I fallen asleep and ended up having an erotic dream!?! Unsure on whether these events were truly happening, her body took on a life of its own and began unzipping Chen Mo’s trousers. Kyaaa! It’s so hot! A little overcome by the realism of Chen Mo’s manhood, she couldn’t help but rub him as he massaged her.

After a long while of them feeling each other up, Chen Mo finally took off his lower garments and pulled Miao Yuan’s underwear down. He spread her legs and entered her.

Due to the immense amount of overstimulation from both pain and pleasure, Miao Yuan blanked out for a few minutes as Chen Mo carved his way into her. Once she came to, all she could hear was their rough panting as they moved in sync with one another and simply felt the waves of ecstasy.

A long while later, Chen Mo released his desires inside her and collapsed on top. Miao Yuan, completely depleted of stamina and mental strength, just lay there, barely breathing from climaxing along with him. They soon fell asleep, fatigued by their activities, too tired to even clean themselves afterwards.

In the early hours of the morning, Chen Mo’s phone started vibrating and he awoke with a start before answering. Miao Yuan, not really aware of what was going on, just snuggled into his side as he spoke with whoever was on the other end.

“Yes Sir! I’ll be there immediately.”

Ending the call and turning to Miao Yuan, he lightly caressed her cheek, before leaving the bed and getting dressed.

“I have to go now. I’ll be back tonight.”

He kissed her forehead and left.

The apartment was silent as Miao Yuan slowly came to her senses. What just happened!?! Did Chen Mo and I really just do….do… the deed!?! Squealing in embarrassment into her pillow, she knew that they had indeed consummated their feelings the previous night, her lower half wet and slimy from the evidence of Chen Mo’s desires. After about fifteen minutes of her squealing, she finally decided to get out of bed and take a shower.

During that day, she couldn’t help but smile as she worked. Momo just stared at her as if looking at a mentally challenged child, and sighed every now and then.

“Having daughters is truly a bad thing. Sons are much better.”

That night, Miao Yuan dressed up in nicer clothes than the previous day, and waited in her apartment for Chen Mo to come.

Midnight came, and Miao Yuan was still sat on the sofa waiting.


Where is he? He said he’d come tonight… A little anxious, she checked her phone over and over again, worried she’d missed a message or call from him. Nothing. No sign of him contacting her could be found. Thinking this a little odd, she sent him a message asking if he was still at work.


Half an hour later, and there was still no response.

She tried ringing him, but it went straight to voicemail, so left a message asking him if he was alright, before mentioning it was late and she needed to go to bed. The next day, she woke up to no new messages. Feeling a little dejected, Miao Yuan slowly got ready for work.

Over the next few days, Miao Yuan’s creativity in the kitchen began to waver and wither. The Huangqiao sesame cake3 that she made kept coming out mushy rather than flaky. Momo, noticing this, wondered whether it had something to do with Chen Mo, but didn’t want to make her friend’s mood worse, so remained silent.

The days passed and soon it had been two weeks since their passionate night. Miao Yuan woke up, as usual, and felt ill. Running to the bathroom, she was sick. Thinking nothing of it, she continued preparing for work, and then needed to go again. This repeated for a few more days when she thought to herself, am I ill? Should I take a few days off? As she wondered this, Momo could see her friend getting paler and worried over her health.

“Geez, Miao Miao, it’s like you’re suffering morning sickness or something. Go home, I’ll cover for you.”

Miao Yuan froze. M-m-m-morning sickness!?! Bowing to Momo, she hugged her before leaving the cafe, stopping by a pharmacy along the way. Once she returned home, she immediately opened a box she’d bought and headed to the bathroom. A few minutes later, she came out crawling on the floor weakly.


This can’t be…it was only one night…and only one time…how…?

Lying on the floor, she messaged Chen Mo saying she needed to talk to him, before doing the same with Momo.

Once closing time came around for the cafe, Miao Yuan’s phone rang. Not looking at who it was, she immediately answered it, saying:

“Chen Mo! I have some news you need to hear!”


“Chen Mo?”

“Miao Yuan…this is Momo you klutz! At least look at who the caller is before answering. What if I’d been a loan shark you owed money to?”

Hearing her friend’s voice and not Chen Mo’s, Miao Yuan couldn’t stand it any longer and burst into tears.

“Waaaaaah! Moooooooomooooooooo! *sniff* I need companyyyyyyyyy! Waaaaaah”

“Ehhhhh? *sigh* Fine, fine. I’ll come. I’ll bring some booze and snacks.”

“Waaaaaah! Noooooo booooooze! Waaaaaaah!”

“Ehhhhhh!?! I’ll be there soon, just hold on.”

“*sniff* Thanks Momoooooooooo! *sniff*”

The phone call ended and Miao Yuan curled up into a ball, holding a white stick in her hand with two pink lines showing and a digital display reading: POSITIVE.

About half an hour later, there was a knock at the door. Miao Yuan, still bawling her eyes out, crawled to the door and opened it on her hands and knees. Momo, seeing this sight, couldn’t help but feel a little concerned over Miao Yuan’s actions. Coming through the door, she closed it behind her and observed her friend’s behaviour. Her friend in question, had curled up into a ball again and was crying even more than on the phone.

“What’s going on? Why are you in such a pitiful state?”

Looking at Miao Yuan, she noticed the white stick and took it from her hands. Staring at it for a few seconds, she switched her eyes from it to her friend a few times, a poker face showing nothing of what she was thinking. She slowly put the white stick on a nearby table, and went to pull Miao Yuan up. Guiding her to the sofa, she made sure she sat on it, before going into the kitchen and getting a glass of water. Returning to her friend, she handed the glass to her:

“Here, drink. You’re probably quite dehydrated from crying. You need to keep your body healthy.”

She sat next to her and put her arm around her, stroking her shoulder. Miao Yuan took the glass and drank from it, her crying subsiding a little.

“So? Mind telling me how this happened?”

“…Well…it all started when….”

Miao Yuan recounted her date with Chen Mo, her mood perking up a bit as she mentioned his romantic gestures of making a heart and her name. She then described how they had a passionate night together, before he left her for work. Her mood dampened at this point.

“I haven’t heard from him since that morning…and now this…Waaaaaah! Mooooomooooo!”

Not able to bear it, she wrapped her arms around Momo and cried into her shoulder.

“There, there…”

Patting and rubbing Miao Yuan’s shoulder, Momo just sat there getting wet from her friend’s tears. Her face changed to a sour, dark look, before looking back at Miao Yuan, her gaze softening. Pushing her away so they were facing one another, she lightly kissed her on the lips.

“Miao Yuan. If Chen Mo has gone MIA, then I’ll be there for you in his stead. Let me be your shoulder to cry on in the tough times ahead. Let me be your pillar of support. Let me anchor you to the world. Let me have you as mine.”


Before Miao Yuan could finish her question, Momo pulled her close and kissed her deeply.


Releasing her from her mouth, Momo looked deeply into Miao Yuan’s eyes, her cheeks blushed rouge as she caressed her cheek. Looking down at her stomach, she stroked it and said:

“We’ll raise it together, you and I. If Chen Mo won’t have you, then I will!”

Huangqiao Sesame Cake
  1. Be reactive rather than proactive; instead of wondering why he feels sore, she should do something to make him feel better.
  3. Huangqiao sesame cake is a sesame seed cake that usually has filling.

Comments (15)

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  1. Ash · Apr 2, 2018


    But such good writing!! You're talented!! Write some steamy fanfic again please!

    Reply · 0 Likes ·
    • Nyaarenne · Editor · Apr 8, 2018

      Maybe, nyaa~


      Reply · 0 Likes ·
  2. otometearoom · Apr 1, 2018

    I don't know if it's real?!

    Reply · 0 Likes ·
    • Wafflebeauty · Apr 2, 2018

      No way it's real~ perhaps the first part but the sudden change in Chen Mo and Momo is too absurd <.<
      But if it is truly a made up, i give two thumbs up! Good writing! Nice rated scene *cough*

      Reply · 0 Likes ·
      • Nyaarenne · Editor · Apr 2, 2018

        *nuzzles you*


        Reply · 0 Likes ·
    • blobber · Translation Checker · Apr 2, 2018

      april fools?

      Reply · 0 Likes ·
  3. Anonymous · Apr 1, 2018

    No way this is real. Must be April fool !

    Reply · 0 Likes ·
    • Wafflebeauty · Apr 2, 2018

      Agreed xD

      Reply · 0 Likes ·
  4. Ash · Apr 1, 2018

    .... is this an April Fool?

    Reply · 0 Likes ·
  5. Anonymous · Apr 1, 2018

    LOL what April Fool's is this. XDDD

    Reply · 0 Likes ·
  6. Anonymous · Apr 1, 2018


    Reply · 0 Likes ·
  7. Anonymous · Apr 1, 2018

    Thank you for the update. Didn't see that coming.

    Reply · 0 Likes ·
  8. Anonymous · Apr 1, 2018

    ...wait what!?!!! Well i absolutly did not see this coming!!!
    Ahhh chen Mo!!!! hurry back!

    Reply · 0 Likes ·
  9. ManWithAHat · Apr 1, 2018

    This kinda scares me, he doesn't seem like this kinda person does he?

    Reply · 0 Likes ·
  10. Agent Psyx o7 · Editor · Apr 1, 2018

    It would be cute if the baby is a girl~ Her name could be something like Miao Miao? Miao Mo?

    Reply · 0 Likes ·